What Do You Think?
How Do We Know If Someone Is Being Bullied?
A Washington Post article about What Killed Kevin reported that Kevin Morrissey’s suicide “was embraced as a textbook example of a manager’s verbal and psychological abuse of an employee. That reading is far too simple, argues Beverly Peterson…” Now that you’ve had a chance to experience What Killed Kevin and hear for yourself what Kevin’s co-workers and family told me, read some of the documents I gathered, and checked out definitions and resources, what do you think? Why?
Kevin’s suicide was a “classic” case of Bully vs Target. The perpetrator knows very well what they did. They acted deliberate, calculating, and with malice aforethought . It is evident in the “Im so sorry attitude” they now portray because blood is still running through their veins so they can do that. In all reality they are just as guilty as any cold blooded murderer would be. It’s time to tell the truth as it is and stop protecting these huge companys or entitys who are behind the scenes pulling the trigger.
Thanks so much for commenting and expressing your point of view. One of the most interesting aspects of this specific situation is that all of the different points of view are represented. Sometimes comments come from surprising sources. For instance, there’s a clip in the film in which Waldo, one of Kevin’s co-workers who was also his best friend at the time of his death, says that there wasn’t any malice on Ted’s part. Does that matter?
I was bullied out of my last job in higher ed after 24 years in the field. Trust me – if you were an occasional visitor to our office, my supervisor seemed like a charming, warm person. However, if you dared to cross him in even the most innocuous way, you were privately belittled and cross-examined. Occasional visitors – and superiors – do not make great witnesses; they do not see the vindictiveness. My supervisor knew I was experiencing a reoccurrence with major depression and used it against me. I quit soon thereafter, and after being unemployed for over a year, it has been suggested that I seek SSD for work-related PTSD. I loved my work and demonstrated mettle throughout my career, but the nasty comments, coworker mobbing, and ostracizing eventually ate away any semblance of self-worth I had in my career.
Ted says claims to be blamed for Morrissey’s suicide is even more questionable? Genoways has been branded as a workplace bully in part because a small band of advocates? The fact that the co-workers go before the Boss and tell them Kevin is suicidal is suspicious. That means they knew all along what they were doing, thus Kevin may not have committed suicide. Of course any employee that is still living and working can say Ted showed no signs of malice; especially if they want to keep their job. Best friend? Since when and how long? It’s a well known fact that Bully’s recruit their buddy’s, co-workers, family, and the list goes on. I think they should find out who first suggested the suicide notice to the boss, or were they all in agreement?
Bullies go after people in a coldblooded calculated manner.
1. They are excellent liars and pretenders to others.
2. They isolate the “target” sometimes by “befriending” any of that person’s friends or potential friends.
3. They pretend they are innocent and/or the real victim.
4. They attack the person emotionally until the person slowly becomes depressed, loses self esteem and enters a downward spiral.
5. Usually, anybody who wants to keep their job will stay silent.
6. They use language to degrade, humiliate, and undermine their target.
7. Most of the workplaces I have been in reward the bullies with promotions and special rewards.
I am now leaving a job because of workplace bulling by my supervisor and a cultural atmosphere of “us aganist them”. Thank God I am able to move on into another job with better culture and pay! Many people are not that lucky.
I started the job with hope and optimistism. Within the first 2 months all of upoer management left after being there for years. My Supervisor was replaced with a inexperienced sycophant. The first time he bullied me i went directly to ersonnel and was told”oh he is just inexperienced”. I replied, I understand, but I do not want to be the victim of his inexperience” I was asked “what do you want me to do? I said, “document my complaint and ensure my supervisor understands the law”. I went to Human Resources 2 more times regarding the bully tacts being used aganist me. After that I became a target.
I find your whole endeavor with this film to be confusing, and indeed disturbing. On the one hand, materials that you present on this site and your related sites seem to indicate that your are knowledgeable about workplace bullying, and sympathetic to helping its victims. But then your film and this accompanying website totally contradicts those impressions.
One of the fundamental dynamics that often leads to workplace bullying is ambiguity, which permeates many facets of a workplace environment. (e.g. confidentiality of personnel actions; unequal implementation of policies; backroom deals and favors; office gossip; etc.) Of course, any environment of multifaceted interpersonal interactions (abetted by differential amounts of power) are complicated to understand, and thus can seem ambiguous unless one knows how to parse through the situation. However, these layers of ambiguity are often used/manipulated by the bully to their tactical advantage. And these ambiguities are also often used by managers/administrators as excuses/justifications for their negligence in dealing effectively with bullying situations. But the ambiguity itself is not real; rather, it’s superimposed on the TRUE situation by the bulyy and the management who want/need to create a fake sense of ambiguity in order to intentionally obscure the truth (and thus protect themselves).
What’s confusing about your film (and this website) is that you appear to be capitalizing on the seeming amibiguities of this particularly tragic situation. You’re playing up the ambiguities as raising questions about this situation, when in fact, these ambiguities are archetypical to most bullying situations. But, as stated above, these “ambiguities” are not real; they are part of the complex (and often dysfunctional) work environment that’s being manipulated by the bully (and then by the negligent management) to obscure the truth. Anyone who has studied workplace bullying knows how to readily see through these fake ambiguities; and any knowledgeable observer can see that the situation at VQR clearly demonstrates many of the aspects and dynamics of an archetypical case of bullying.
But what turns “confusing” into “disturbing” is the fact that you yourself seem to be fomenting the fake sense of ambiguity, in a sensationalistic manner. This makes some sense, if looked at from the perspective of someone who wants to promote interest in a film; it adds a layer of intrigue to the film. But coming from someone who professes to be knowledgeable and sympathetic about the true harms of workplace bullying, this crass sensationalism is rather disturbing. After all, as the filmmaker, you have total control over what evidence the viewer does/doesn’t get to see; what portions of each interview are included/omitted; the order and juxtaposition of elements; etc. You get to create whatever truth or ambiguity you wish to portray. A naive viewer might place their trust in what you’ve presented as being complete and objective; and indeed, by fomenting a fake sense of ambiguity you’re playing into those naive sympathies. But to any knowledgeable observer, your film and this website seem to be purposefully playing up the ambiguitiesmerely for the sake of the “art” of your film, rather than for the purposes of adding clarity to a complicated and ultimately tragic situation.
I think it’s important to keep a few things in mind when entering this type of discussion. (1) I actually spoke to all of the people involved in this tragic story and was privy to information that could not be presented. In some cases it was to prevent additional suicidal attempts by person or persons involved if made public. (2) I began the project as someone who had been egregiously bullied and was fully aware of the difficulty of getting others to take you seriously and more importantly to actually engage and help you. No one was more surprised than I was to find a far more complex story actually unfolding. (3) If we are to prevent workplace bullying and protect our workplaces from this devastating and life threatening abuse we need to not pre-judge and assume that all instances are indeed workplace bullying. That would simply encourage witch hunts as opposed to truly addressing change and legislation that can protect us all. (4) This film has been screened at numerous conferences and used by many, many practitioners who are deeply involved in helping raise awareness and working within corporations to address abusive bosses. UVA would have done well to address the concerns raised and either replace Genoways or intervene in a way that allowed the office to function. Ultimately the fault lies with UVA and how they handled it and I didn’t find anyone inside the office who didn’t agree with that. (5) The “sensationalism” was on the part of the Today Show and the advocates who took advantage of a grieving sister and traumatized co-workers. Again, I didn’t find anyone within the office who didn’t feel that. The documentary was meant to open discussion, which it has, about how we dig through the “he said/he said” to find out what can be done to improve responses to dysfunctional work environments like the one found at the VQR. And, as with the VQR it is a complex issue that forces a challenge to existing laws – Sandra Day O’Connor argued against bringing incivility into the courts. I would argue that it’s necessary. But, if advocates are going to go on witch hunts it only proves O’Connor right. (6) I personally was devastated emotionally, financially and physically by a bully who was eventually fired and I pray for an end to this type of abuse. If an honest discussion that includes both sides is what it takes – I’m in. (7) Thanks for watching and commenting! – Bev
Phaedrus said:
But what turns “confusing” into “disturbing” is the fact that you yourself seem to be fomenting the fake sense of ambiguity, in a sensationalistic manner.
But to any knowledgeable observer, your film and this website seem to be purposefully playing up the ambiguities merely for the sake of the “art” of your film, rather than for the purposes of adding clarity to a complicated and ultimately tragic situation.
Well said! As time passes on, the narcissist/Bully expose themselves and the real agenda behind the curtain is shown. Their sadistic behaviour deriving pleasure from inflicting pain, suffering, or humiliation on others is cruel, barbarous, vicious, brutal, callous, fiendish, cold-blooded, inhuman, ruthless, heartless; and perverted. The fact is delighting in or feeling pleasure/gain from the pain of others is sadist stemming from a narcissist, sociopath, or psychopathic mind having a grandiose mentality. They will never see the truth as it is because they have excessive interest in or admiration of themselves; an exaggerated feelings of self-importance. Basically put they are empty individuals.
The bully/cohorts lack empathy: the ability to apprehend the mental or emotional state of another individual. They/systems will never admit any guilt, will never reach out to make any amends, and will never apologize to anyone he/she has ever wronged or hurt because they don’t have to.
Victims have to stand their ground. No law exists today in the United States with the stated intent of preventing abuse (mental/emotional/physical) or investigating and prosecuting bully crimes against bullied victims. Bullying is widespread and perhaps the most under-reported safety problem on American school campuses. One reason bully’s are in the school ground may be due to the fact that middle eastern systems have taken over our western systems creating a single heart/minded attitude in children and school officials.
Well, then by your definition this was definitely NOT a case of bullying since Ted Genoways did not take pleasure in Kevin’s depression or his difficulties at work. I can assure you that I suffered greatly from workplace bullying physically and financially and it took me many years to recover. I would never treat the topic lightly for the sake of “art”. I really don’t know any documentary filmmaker who does that.
Even If Kevin were alive you would not be able to extract the truth since it is not in your best interest to do so. How do you know what Genoway’s really felt? In the days leading up to Kevin’s death the interviews showed them all sensing something “wrong” yet no one did anything (or enough) to help Kevin. They all stood back and allowed their “combined efforts to hassle” unfold before their eyes and just watched Kevin die. It was like this “we’ll just wait to see what happens before reacting”; a wait-and-see attitude. How sick!